


Mr. Sensitive

by waldorph



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Community: st_xi_kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-08-02
Updated: 2009-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-28 11:14:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5088578
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waldorph/pseuds/waldorph
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tarsus IV was a catastrophe of eugenics and desperation, and Jim Kirk was there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mr. Sensitive

**Author's Note:**

> written for the st_xi_kink meme: anon's prompt was "I want to see a situation where Kirk is some how left Emotionless and basically acts like a robot, and its up to Spock to try and reawaken the emotions inside of Jim." And scarlet_pencil's addition of "Maybe they see something that shocks Kirk into remembering traumatic events from Tarsus IV, which cause him to revert to being emotionless because he can't really deal with that?"

At first they don't really notice it. Everyone is so preoccupied with rebuilding the planet, making sure riots don't break out while Starfleet sends all its pyschological and top medical personnel to assist Dr. McCoy, that the captain's own withdrawal is almost a relief.   
  
The debris of the city and its wrecked inhabitants who are so afraid of government are—difficult to manage, and Jim Kirk is tiring at the best of times. Without meaning to be, the captain is inevitably a distracting presence, and Spock finds himself approving of the professionalism the captain displays in the wake of the tragedy that is Eccius II.   
  
The leadership of Eccius II, running low on supplies and stranded in the wake of a year of poor harvest and ionic storms and natural disasters which ravaged the planet had engaged in a policy of eugenics after the model of Tarus IV, in which the leader, Governor Kodos, had killed 4,000 of the colonists that the other 4,000 might live.   
  
In that case, only nine people who had seen Kodos' face had survived; all of them children. Two had committed suicide soon after—seven remain, and Spock believes that all of them joined Starfleet.   
  
This does not factor as significant until, four days into the recovery program, the captain's hand becomes caught in a metal door, and he merely observes it.   
  
As though it were another's hand, and not his own. Blood trails down the metal, the skin white, but there is no tightening in Kirk's face- no swearing; no acknowledgment.   
  
Spock is the first to notice, Lt. Sulu's shout following soon after, and Spock is the one who bends the door away from the mangled hand.   
  
"Captain," he says, cradling the shaking, hot hand in his own, placing his other hand on the small of the captain's back, taking note of the blank look in the Kirk's eyes. "Let us go see Dr. McCoy."   
  
The captain allows himself to be led wordlessly.  
  
"Shock," Dr. McCoy dismisses, treating and wrapping the hand. "Keep an eye on him, will you, Spock?" he asks distractedly, turning to the others who desperately need his help. This crisis is such that even McCoy cannot spare time for his friend, and Spock has every intention of keeping Kirk close, but he drifts away and seems to interact normally.   
  
And there is much to be done, regulations to follow and reports to be made, that Spock cannot be a babysitter based on one incident and the captain's withdrawal. Perhaps he is merely sobered by the events which have transpired here.   
  
If he finds himself with more duty than he has come to expect from the last 8 months on the Enterprise (for despite his distracting nature and his limitless energy reserves, Jim Kirk is fast becoming the best captain that Spock has served under), he dismisses the realization and makes the logical assumption that Kirk has found a traumatized, highly attractive citizen of Eccius II and that he is providing his own brand of sympathy.   
  
Spock does not get a flare of jealousy; that would not be logical.   
  
"Have you seen the captain?" Scotty asks after two days have passed. "I dinnae see him in the mess."   
  
Spock frowns, pulling out his comm. "Enterprise, this is Spock. Uhura, please check in."   
  
"Uhura here."   
  
"Please scan for Captain Kirk."   
  
He can almost hear her frown as she does.   
  
"He's with Admiral Rodriguez, Spock," she announces. "Why?"   
  
"Prepare to beam us up, Lt.," he instructs, making his way to the Admiral.   
  
"—Like Tarsus IV," the Admiral is sighing. "Tragedy about that, of course. You were there, weren't you?"   
  
For the first time in three days Spock sees a flicker of emotion pass over the captain's face before he replies expressionlessly, "Yes."   
  
"Captain, we are ready to beam back aboard the Enterprise," Spock says, interjecting his body between the captain's and the admiral's. He cannot decide, based upon these foreign indicators emanating from the captain, whether or not he is likely to attempt to cause the admiral bodily harm, but given the captain's history there is a 56.837% chance that physical violence is likely to occur.   
  
At that moment they are beamed aboard.   
  
"Good work, everyone," the captain says blankly, and makes for his quarters. Dr. McCoy frowns, and starts after him.   
  
"Jim-"  
  
"Tomorrow, Bones," the captain replies in a flat voice.   
  
Spock observes the confusion on the faces of the crew— also notes the unexpected advent of fear on their faces as they review the last week and realize that the captain's acted utterly out of character since they arrived at Eccius II.   
  
Spock goes to his quarters and reads on Kodos, on Tarsus IV.   
  
He cross-references with Jim Kirk.  _Files Sealed Per Starfleet Order 27332.X022_. He frowns. It is illogical not to pursue the information and matter further, given the compromised state the captain is in.   
  
What he reads makes his stomach tighten uncomfortably.   
  
There is a certain logic to the actions of both Kodos and the ruling body on Eccius II. Given fewer resources, rather than risk the entire population the destruction of a faction of the population which drains the resources unduly is logical.   
  
The elderly, the infirm, the mentally unstable or compromised.   
  
Eugenics has a certain logic.   
  
What he did not expect were the reports implying that the reason Jim Kirk survived where the rest of his family (he was, according to the report, stationed with a great-uncle, great-aunt and cousin at the time while his mother was on a brief tour) did not, was due to the fact that Kodos had taken Kirk as his protégée.   
  
Jim Kirk had been groomed for a year to be Kodos' successor; at the age of seven Jim Kirk had actively participated in a genocide.   
  
 _"Unresponsive", "blank", "will interact, but in a limited capacity", "ability to process shuts down emotional reactions; Jim Kirk is too smart to be unaware of what happened, but seems to have developed a coping mechanism similar to that which Vulcan children are taught."_  
  
Spock examines the problem. The captain is emotionally compromised but unable to show it. Unable to vent it; a fear borne of desperation for his own life—had a young Jim Kirk displayed the rage which Spock knows him capable of he is under no illusions that Kodos would have had his young protégé become the 4,001st casualty.   
  
He is assualted by memories of the captain deliberately goading him as he searches for a way to catalyst a reaction: it took medical personnel two years to return Jim Kirk to a semblance of his former self, and Spock doesn't have two years.  
  
The method of antagonism is sound, and Spock turns to the computer again, reading locked files on one James T. Kirk until he is called for Beta shift.   
  
*  
  
The captain sits in the chair blankly.   
  
He is responsive, but emotionless, and the atmosphere on the bridge is brittle and fragile; no one wants to ask the captain what's wrong, but they are all eminently aware that there is a problem.  
  
"Keptin, we're ready to exit orbit around Eccius II," Chekov reports in a subdued, nervous voice, his accent even thicker. Sulu glances over his shoulder; Nyota leans around to survey the expressionless captain with a flicker of concern in her eyes before she looks at Spock promptingly. She is an extraordinary woman- it is unfortunate he was not what she wanted, but the pressures of heightened command made their relationship more brittle, especially as Spock's attentions were absorbed by the management of the captain. More and more he seemed to be the mitigating force—the  _only_  mitigating force, and it was not fair to Nyota to ask her to accept the time he had left.   
  
"Very good, Mr. Chekov. Take us out of orbit, Mr. Sulu, Warp factor 1," Spock says.   
  
Chekov blinks at him, then nervously looks at the captain, who turns to Spock.  
  
"That's my order to give, Spock," Jim says flatly.  
  
"You are in a state of compromise," Spock disagrees. "I am as we speak drawing up the necessary paperwork to have your commission revoked temporarily." They're sitting on his desk, waiting for him to fill them out. He does not want it to come to that. "Mr. Sulu. Warp factor one."   
  
Everyone has frozen. Except the captain, he stands and observes Spock with cool detachment.   
  
"I am not compromised," the captain says, proving the extent to which he is, in fact, compromised;  _everyone_  can see that he is not in any condition to command a ship. Under normal circumstances Jim Kirk would be flying at him, annoyed or enraged or laughingly dismissive.  
  
"Perhaps then I do not want a war criminal captaining a Starfleet starship," Spock offers, turning his eyes towards the viewing screen. "Mr. Sulu."   
  
Sulu does not move.   
  
"War criminal," Jim repeats.   
  
"Yes. I did some reading last night, as in the wake of Eccius II I have been asked to look back upon Tarsus IV. I found extraordinary things."   
  
"Spock."   
  
"For example, you were there, were you not? One of the nine survivors to see Kodos' face. You were his protégé. It was recommended you never be allowed into space for your actions on Tarsus IV; you were exiled to Iowa where the Federation believed you would not be a threat."   
  
The silence on the bridge becomes even more thick.   
  
The captain stares at him. "Spock, may I see you in my quarters?"   
  
"Yes, captain," Spock agrees. "Uhura, you have the conn. Warp factor one, Mr. Sulu."   
  
The ship begins movement (inertial dampeners are better, now that Mr. Scott is with them, but they're not perfect, not yet) as the door to Spock's quarters (a more logical site for this confrontation—he does not want Jim to have the advantage of a… "home court") slides shut behind them.   
  
"Those files—" the captain begins.   
  
"Were confidential. Under the circumstances—"  
  
"Under  _what_  circumstances—"   
  
"—I thought it logical to ignore the confidentiality for the good of the crew and this ship."   
  
"Good of the crew—"   
  
"You are obviously a threat," Spock continues inexorably, watching color rise to Jim's cheeks and his breathing pick up, "and had I been aware of it I would never have suggested that you be given commission of this ship—"  
  
Jim runs at him.  
  
It is graceless, and Spock dodges easily, grabbing his left arm and slamming it up behind is back, pinning the captain to the wall with his other hand pinning the captain's to the wall. He continues in his ear,   
  
"I would have been inclined to think that you had learned from the experience, but the last week indicates that  _this_  is your nature, not as you'd have us believe—"  
  
"Fuck you," Jim hisses, violent and wondrously angry, shoving back against Spock's body and trying to get enough leverage to fling him off. "I had no choice— I was a  _kid_ —I kept sending fucking Starfleet signals and they  _ignored_  my warnings. I was  _seven_  you bastard—" In a spurt of anger-driven rage the captain shoves Spock off, lands a blow which snaps his head around, and Spock tastes blood.   
  
"I was  _seven_ ," Jim repeats in helpless rage, and Spock grips him, shoves him back against the wall and holds his hands to it, pins him with thighs pressed against Jim's and kisses him.   
  
Jim's teeth sink into his lower lip but Spock doesn't pull away, doesn't flinch back, keeps the pressure against the captain until the his lip is released in favor of a biting, violent kiss. He trails kisses down Kirk's neck, bites and then licks away the sting of it, marks him until the captain is hard and rutting against his thigh shamelessly.   
  
" _Spock_ , Jesus, Spock, please, c'mon,  _please_ , I-" he groans, and Spock releases his hands, pulls Kirk's shirt up to bite along his chest, worrying a nipple as he shoves down Jim's pants to stroke his leaking cock.   
  
Jim's hands are everywhere- pulling at Spock's shirt ineffectually, stroking over his face and his ears, tugging at his hair, gripping his arms and shoulders and it is illogical that such a random series of touches be erotic, but Spock  _wants_  this, wants a practical demonstration of the man whom he has come to be fond of— the man who is his captain.   
  
Jim Kirk is impossibly Human. Spock cannot bear for him to be anything else.   
  
He shoves Jim around, braces him against the wall, Jim shoving his ass against Spock's invading fingers hungrily, perhaps needing to feel this as much as Spock needs to. Spock grips his aching cock and presses his hips forward.   
  
Jim's body resists counter to the groans of "C'mon, Spock, fuck me already", and Spock stills, chest pressed to Jim's damp back, listening to the hitching breaths, hand working diligently at Jim's cock until something in the quality of the breath changes, until Jim shoves himself against the door and then back onto Spock. Then Spock begins to fuck him in earnest, rough, using his superior strength to keep Jim in place, to keep him helpless, the angle rough.   
  
He removes his hand from Jim's cock with a bereft cry from Jim, grips his hips and slams into the body under him until the profanities streaming from Jim's lips turn to soft, whimpering cries of frustrated pleasure. He allows this to continue until Jim's knees begin to buckle under the strain of it, until he has soaked Spock's shirt with his perspiration. He slams in once, twice, a third time and comes in heaving, breathless spurts into Jim's body, forehead pressed against the back of Jim's neck as his hand lifts from the bruises it has undoubtedly marked into Jim's skin and wraps around his cock.   
  
At the briefest touch Jim is coming with a strangled cry. If Spock were romantic, he might search for his name in that sound, but it is unlikely the captain would be able to remember his own name, much less Spock's (though there is something appealing about the thought that he could fuck everything from Jim's head but Spock's name- another time, perhaps).   
  
He lifts the shivering man to the bed, goes to the bathroom to get a washcloth and slowly, carefully cleans Jim off, wiping his cock, his chest, even his chin, then between his legs, where Spock's come is beginning to leak out. Jim twitches- aftereffects of sensory overload, turns his head and Spock gives him the gentle kiss which he seeks.   
  
Lays beside him, falls into sleep until he must awake for the Beta shift—Jim is cleared for the day.   
  
"You told the crew," Jim accuses, glaring at him sleepily as Spock dresses.   
  
"They understand," Spock replies. He has had Dr. McCoy explain the situation. "It was necessary to elicit a response in order to bring you back to us."   
  
Jim gives him a look. "Spock. It's okay if you just wanted to fuck me."   
  
His grin is wide and wicked as he stretches in Spock's bed, and Spock stares at him, mouth dry. It is distressing that he prefers the man like this. It is not _logical_.   
  
He wants him nevertheless. Impossible, vibrant, and distracting. 

**Author's Note:**

>  **Blanket Permission:** go ahead and translate, make podfic, rework the fic, or do whatever other transformative work you can think of. If the work is hosted on another site, drop me a comment or email and I'll put a link in the story notes!
> 
> [twitter:](https://twitter.com/waldorph) for unfiltered me || [tumblr:](http://waldorph.tumblr.com/) less about me, more about the pretty gifsets and art


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